Monday, January 3, 2011

Who I Am


To my friends who never knew me before Lyme disease:

Did you ever wonder what I was like before I got sick? Did you know I didn't always act so clumsy and drop things all day long? Did you know I didn't always wander from room to room trying to figure out where I was going or what I was looking for? Did you know I actually used to have a good memory?

Did you know I used to cook and bake every day (yes, me, the girl who can't even be trusted with a teapot!)? Did you know I used to make bread for my family every single week, kneading the dough for 15 minutes?

Did you know I never used to take medicine, not even Tylenol? Did you know I vowed never to take vitamins? Take a look in my medicine cabinet now and have a good laugh with me.

I used to ride my horse all the time. I used to go for long walks every day. I used to go hiking and camping. I used to play with my kids all day long and take them to playgroups and playgrounds. I used to drive everywhere. I used to spend hours wandering around taking pictures.

Lyme disease has stripped me of so many things, but that's all they ever were: things. Lyme disease can never strip me of who I truly am. I am still a tenacious, passionate, courageous girl. I am still silly and full of life. Though I now act like a ditzy, clumsy, scatterbrained person, that's not me. Look closely, because the true me is peeking out from behind my fragile body.

I hope the girl you see is strong and brave, witty and resourceful. I hope you won't see me for what I am not, but for what I am.

2 comments:

  1. Yes! You are you. You are awesome!

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  2. I knew you before AND after, and I think you're still amazing in both ways! Before, I loved being around you at the barn (saddle club!) Now, I love how you're always so helpful and there for me. You've really helped me through a tough year. So you still have a lot of amazing things left to do!

    Ashley :)

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