Thursday, December 2, 2010

What Color is Your Lyme Disease?

Yesterday was a classic example of an average day in Lymeland. I felt fantastic in the morning, but by evening I was a mess. With Lyme Disease, one minute you're up, the next minute you're down, waaaaaaaaaaay down.

A typical day with Lyme looks like this: People are calling and texting to high five you on your awesome morning (news travels fast!), but by then you're laying on the floor eerily resembling the old lady in the "Help, I've fallen and I can't get up!" commercials. You have no recollection of feeling well in the last 90 or so years (and you can only assume by the way you are feeling that you probably are around 90 years old). Next thing you know, the calls from worried friends and family come rolling in to tell you they're sorry you're feeling bad again. But you'll need to call them back, because now you're busy cleaning the bathroom. Huh?! Welcome to Lyme Disease. It's enough to make your head spin!

This disease would be easier if it came with its own special set of buttons to wear to explain to confused friends and family how to proceed: "Feelin' Bad, Keep Back 500 Feet!" "Need Words of Encouragement" "Need Chocolate!!" "Feelin' Fantastic!" "Clear the Bathroom!" etc. Or perhaps a color-coded system would work better. Brown means you are feeling bad; green means you are feeling good. Purple means you're pissed off; white means you're wiped out. You get the idea.

Unfortunately, as far as I know, such a system doesn't exist (artsy people, take note; those buttons sound awesome!). So, while saying "Hey, I heard you are feeling better!" is fine, a better way to find out what color your chameleon of a Lyme friend currently is, simply ask, "How are you feeling?"

We Lyme folks are very grateful for those of you who call to check in on us, and we don't mean to confuse the heck out of you, but this disease changes faster than lightning, and we can't even keep up with it!

PS I'm currently feeling sage for so-so.

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